Zips
Rob’s asking me, “What do you mean you have a surprise honey?” I look over at my husband of 20yrs as I pull into the Fontanel’s sun filled lot and park the car. It’s 2 o’clock in the afternoon. “Well,” I say taking a deep breath, “we’re not just here for the restaurant and distillery tour. We’re going on a zip line tour too.” Rob gives me an incredulous look. “You’re shitting me!” “Nope. We’re doing something memorable instead of traditional for once. I’m hoping to get us 3 o’clock tickets.” Even if it kills me I think to myself. I hate heights and I get sick on the Merry-Go-Round so I’m not sure how well I’m going to do with this but I’m determined. I know he’ll enjoy it once we get going but I have to steel myself to get out of the car. I’m nervous but I’m determined to try. I want us to look back in 20yrs and say “remember the zip lines we did on our 20th Anniversary in Nashville? That was crazy cool! I can’t believe we did it!” I’m determined not to have a bunch of “What If” regrets when we’re older.
The first thing I see is a humongous, over 6 ft tall metal Gibson guitar painted red, white and blue leaning against the side of this little fieldstone house covered in roses. Good sign? Makes me smile so I take it as such. We both like what we see. It’s a gorgeous day, beautiful property, with buildings and people all around. We see a big, beautiful, new log cabin that says “Pritchard Distillery” and “Tours” on the side at far end of the parking lot and the little fieldstone house, a tiny white dairy barn and 2 huge metal buildings, one tan, and one gray that says it’s an Italian Restaurant at the other end of the lot.
“Let’s try over here honey.” I say as I head across the lot towards the house. I’m not really sure where to go for the tickets so I’m just assuming this is the right direction. Rob follows. He’s not sure about the zip line tour but I lured him out with a tale of the Fontanel Mansion and a tour of the grounds as well as the distillery and the restaurant. He’s still hoping for that instead. Nope, sorry. As we get closer I read “Tour Tickets” on a sign in front of the house so we go in.
I know what Rob is thinking, Uh-oh, a store with trinkets. We’ll never get out of here. I’m happy though. It’s the right spot for tour tickets and they have postcards too. Yay! The little nieces and nephews love getting them. As we look around, we realize something. All I’d really looked at was the zip line tour. I’d never looked at the history of the Fontanel itself. The place was built by country music superstar Barbara Mandrel and her husband 15 yrs ago. Huh. Guess that explains that giant tour bus parked next to the barn. Barbara’s stuff is for sale all over in here. But there’s also some cool shirts and hats with just Fontanel, Nashville on them. And these local artists they’ve got in here have some sweet stuff! Too expensive to buy, but I can take a photo and drool.
We pick out some postcards, a t-shirt or two and head to the counter. As she starts to ring us up, she asks where we’re from. “Illinois” I tell her. “Can I get 2 adult tickets for the zip line tour at 3pm also?” I add. She looks thoughtful. “I have to double check, I think it may have been booked full.” She switches computer screens and looks for a minute. “Yep, it’s full. We do have the 4 o’clock open still. That ok? You’d just meet here at 3:55 on the porch. You know it’ll take about two hours right?” I nod yes. My stomach is rolling already but I’m hiding it from Rob pretty well.
Rob asks what we can do for the next hour and a half. As she hands us our zip line tickets, the cashier replies with “The free distillery tour. You get to sample some too. It might help if you’re nervous about the Zips.” “The what?” Asks Rob. “Oh”, she says, “that’s what we call the zip lines. Zips.” I almost miss that part. I’m still focused on the sampling she’s talking about. “What exactly does Pritchards make anyway? I only know of their bourbon.” Booze? Before I do something that will probably scare me silly? Heck ya! I’m game! “They do both rums and bourbons there. Very small batches.” Rob looks at me and asks if I want to go over there now or wait.“I’m fine. No problem going right now. We’ve got over an hour to fill so let’s go look around.” We take our purchases and leave, stopping at the car on our way over to the log cabin to put our stuff away in the trunk.
When we get to Pritchards, we walk in but the tour guide starts us off on the tasting portion instead of the tour itself since there’s a huge tour in there already. I won’t complain. The first one we try is called Sweet Lucifer. Smooth but it’s got a bite. HOT! There’s hot peppers in here? No wonder! Yuck! The next one is Sweet Lucy. Yumm. Wow. Fudge Brownie? Even better! Double chocolate?!?! Oh my. Not that one. I’ll be in trouble with that one. After a few shot samples and a short tour, we make some purchases. Back to the car again to put the bags away.
30 minutes left to wait. “Let’s get a soda while we wait. Maybe some chocolate too?” I ask. Rob suggests sitting on the deck in the shade as we drink our Pepsis and eat our Goo-Goos. Chocolate, caramel, nougat goodness. He’s really nervous. We’re waiting for a large green passenger van to pick us up. I’m chattering away, trying to encourage Rob and keep him from figuring out just how nervous I really am. He always gets wound up before doing something new. He was like this when we went on our honeymoon cruise and when we flew for the first time too. Freaked out beforehand and when we finally did it, he loved it. Unfortunately I got sick on the boat and hated the flight, but those are other stories.
Crap. The van is here and our guide is a perky little scrawny 20yr old girl college coed named Liz. We have 2 women older than us, Nancy and Linda and their nephew, an 11 yr old named George in our group. I feel inadequate already. Liz makes us all fill out liability forms with next of kin information. Way to go to help calm the nerves Liz! I fill out Rob’s too while I’m at it. Keeps me from thinking. All too soon we’re there and in our harnesses and hard hats. Our other guide is named Austin. He’s a kid too. My heart is beating so hard and my lips are tingling so I start wondering if I’m having a heart attack or a stroke. It’s a steep walk up to the first zip and my knees are hurting again so I let everyone go first. They’re waiting on me. Austin gives the obligatory safety speech and then he dives off and goes. George yells that he wants to go next. We let him and we all laugh as he makes a running leap off and laughs like crazy all the way over. His aunts are next, then Rob. I’m the last one left besides Liz. She’ll come over after me.
Liz asks if I’m ready. I tell her not really. I get motion sickness on the Ferris Wheel. What the hell am I doing this for again? Oh yeah, so we can look back and have special memories. Whatever. Doesn’t sound so important to me now. All I want is just to not pass out or pee on myself. Liz says maybe I should try closing my eyes. It takes a couple of minutes of Liz talking and me breathing deep to get the nerve up but then I jump. Inside my head I’m screaming bloody murder but I can’t get anything to come out of my mouth. I’m completely frozen. I wonder if I’ll pass out, my chest feels so tight and compressed. Closing my eyes is SO much worse than I thought it would be. When I get to the other side, I am so shaky I scare Rob. All I can think of is “I did it!” and “Oh crap, we gotta do it again?”
Everyone goes in the same order as before. Liz tells me that if I can get thru the third jump I can make it thru all of them. She says the third jump is the highest and the farthest. Oh joy. I remember to get my phone out and start taking photos of Rob. The little shit. First thing he does is jump off the second platform and laugh like a hyena the whole way across. I’m actually pissed at him because he’s enjoying it so much and I’m freaking out so bad. Well, I wanted him to have fun. I guess he is. What? He even went over hands free? Like hell I’m doing that! I look at the second jump. I can see the other side and everyone waiting. It still takes a couple of minutes before I can get my nerve up but I jump. Same shit happens. Rob looks worried and holds my hand when I get over. I’m seriously tempted to just stop. Quit. But I know myself well enough to know I’d be pissed at myself for a long time and I’d be ashamed of myself too.
I just realized that the third jump is from a two story tower? With a small ladder on top of that? Crap. I can’t see the other side either. Austin stays this time and Liz goes first. I try to video Rob as he goes but I’m distracted and realize I’ve just been taking crappy photos. Austin’s watching me and he tells me, “Scream next time. We’ve had people pass out because they panic and don’t breath. If you’re screaming, you’re breathing. It will make it easier to handle. You’re also making it bounce. Lean into the line and take up the slack so you don’t feel so much bounce.” I nod Ok. He’s actually holding my hand while I stand on the ladder and get my nerve up. It takes me about five minutes before I start to go and then I actually jump back onto the ladder. Chicken. Now I’m pissed at myself. Austin says that was an interesting move I just did. I give him a dirty look but then I realize he just said it to calm me down and distract me. I hold his hand again and breath deep a couple of times. I lean down into the slack and let go. Eyes wide open as I fly across. And I scream. Loudly and quite shrilly all the way across. “SSSSSSSSHHHHHIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTT!!!!” Over and over. Thud. My ass hits the wooden platform as I land and slide up onto the other side. Oh my God, I did it and I actually took notice of some of the trees as they went by too. Austin comes flying over grinning and he high fives me while we laugh.
My husband hugs me and tells I did great. I apologize to George’s aunts for swearing on the way over. They laugh and say they didn’t hear anything but shrieks anyway. We make it thru the next four more jumps. They all seem to get smaller and a little easier as we go but I still have to breath deep and I still swear a lot. Poor George. He’s learning some new words today. Am I starting to enjoy this? Not sure yet. I’m still shaking from all the adrenaline. Last jump. Yippee!!! A double zip? What’s… Oh, it’s two zip lines together so two could go at the same time. Rob says he wants to hold hands as we go. Hell no, I ain’t letting go of that rope for anything! I tell him “I love ya honey but I don’t want to hold hands and I just want to go. See ya!” I wave at him as I lean in and take off. He jumps off a second behind and screams “Woo-hoo!” all the way across.
As I land I start laughing and can’t stop. Relief? Rob comes in to land too and as we unhook our harnesses, he grabs me in a bearhug and twirls me around. I am so excited that I did it. I didn’t chicken out. All these emotions. Happy for him because I didn’t ruin his experience, happy for me for doing it. Proud of myself for doing something I wasn’t sure of. Self satisfaction because I faced something that scared me for both mine and my husbands benefit. Pride, self confidence, happiness, and love when I see his shining eyes. Wow. I’m reeling. I just did two hours of heart thumping zip lines in the woods of Tennessee, with my husband on our 20th wedding anniversary.
“One last question Liz? How far is it to the nearest bathroom?”