everything and nothing

Natalie Swanson

 

a familiar fragrance invades my nostrils

for the briefest of moments, its

a peculiarity an anomaly

i ponder its origin for days

resorting to wretched memories

scorned dreams

the starry array on my ceiling glances at me begging for an answer.

i whisper “be still, it won’t be long”

and from the deepest depths

prized recollections only to be seen once in a lifetime

out of the wicked vault

emerges your scent.

 

the little infinity flashes before me

everything and nothing,

the nerve endings of my lips awaken

to recall the first graze we shared

of honey lime and salt

sweat dripping from our brow

shallow breaths and hollow hands

intestines crawling through my throat

i utter your name out loud

like a gauche Shakespeare

the formation of letters has lost its ease

back on the bike after years of running,

recalling pierces my dreams.

 

i hear you cry my name

sing my name

chant my name whisper it coo it

years of hopeless devotion

not a single thought on my mind besides

 

the closest moment i had to proclaim you

and it’s now in the blank space of heaven and earth.