{"id":402,"date":"2025-11-16T05:05:23","date_gmt":"2025-11-16T05:05:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/?page_id=402"},"modified":"2025-11-18T00:28:12","modified_gmt":"2025-11-18T00:28:12","slug":"hope","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/poetry\/hope\/","title":{"rendered":"Hope"},"content":{"rendered":"

Jennifer McClellan<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019m a stare out-the-window kind of girl,<\/span><\/p>\n

inherently thinking I might find my place<\/span><\/p>\n

along the spine of a highway, as if the asphalt<\/span><\/p>\n

curves will tilt me in the direction I belong.<\/span><\/p>\n

The faraway doesn\u2019t feel so far away today<\/span><\/p>\n

from my view in the passenger seat of your car,<\/span><\/p>\n

our vessel to freedom<\/em> and rebellion<\/em> that once<\/span><\/p>\n

smelled of incense smoke, but now<\/span><\/p>\n

of French fries and hotel cookies.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

This is so rare these days, us alone like this.<\/span><\/p>\n

Our voices in the air like darts departing fingertips<\/span><\/p>\n

getting carried away with all the places we might go,<\/span><\/p>\n

eventually, but this world was never meant for us.<\/span><\/p>\n

Through the window, tree trunks stand up<\/span><\/p>\n

like imperfect lines on a musical staff for the intricate<\/span><\/p>\n

waves of Death Cab, Deftones, and Tool.<\/span><\/p>\n

76 hours\/35 minutes of your playlist are proof<\/span><\/p>\n

that dreams dry out the death in us,<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

This is taking longer than it should,<\/span><\/p>\n

and I hear it in your sighs. Your foot<\/span><\/p>\n

on the gas pedal, stop-go-stop, pissed off<\/span><\/p>\n

moving like a writer\u2019s blocked pen,<\/span><\/p>\n

despite the dreamy view of hot air balloons<\/span><\/p>\n

rising out of the mountain fog.<\/span><\/p>\n

Your knee hits the keys dangling from the ignition<\/span><\/p>\n

as your foot moves to the brake again.<\/span><\/p>\n

You say we\u2019ll never take the I-40 again, but then<\/span><\/p>\n

your hand reaches for my leg over the center console<\/span><\/p>\n

and I want<\/em> this to be a slow thing, because normally<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019m programmed for urgency.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I glance down at my pearl nails,<\/span><\/p>\n

patterned with lilac sun rays and stars, and think of<\/span><\/p>\n

the Whitman line you wrote in my notebook once<\/span><\/p>\n

when I wasn\u2019t looking, about shadows falling behind us.<\/span><\/p>\n

My ring reflects the sunlight; I raise my gaze<\/span><\/p>\n

and I can breathe like myself, knowing<\/span><\/p>\n

we are more than a beginning.<\/span><\/p>\n

Your touch calms the tempests beneath my skin.<\/span><\/p>\n

It feels like I\u2019ve tagged home base again, as if<\/span><\/p>\n

seventeen years haven\u2019t carved lines around our eyes.<\/span><\/p>\n

The vibrant leaf tips along the October highway<\/span><\/p>\n

remind me that things will change,<\/span><\/p>\n

but the look in your eyes is permanent.<\/span><\/p>\n

This is how I want to stay, with you.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\nJennifer McClellan I\u2019m a stare out-the-window kind of girl, inherently thinking I might find my place along the spine of…\n<\/div>\n
Continue reading “Hope”<\/span>…<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":89,"featured_media":0,"parent":322,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-402","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/402","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/89"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=402"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/402\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":404,"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/402\/revisions\/404"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/322"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/euphemism.illinoisstate.edu\/21-1\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=402"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}