by August Muñoz
I stop for a moment,
reflect on my life.
I realized at 19 that I liked girls
and that girl
was you.
I guarantee that it was before then,
but time will never tell.
But in this moment, time doesn’t matter
In this moment, as I lay on your chest
It becomes the only place I feel truly comfortable
Your chin resting somewhere near the top of my forehead
My nose nestled into your neck
This is where I feel okay, where time disappears
The clock from the desk glares red
And time ticks away
Minute after minute, we lose more sleep
But sleep can be made up for
Time with you; irreplaceable
19 years.
19 years long without the girl,
The girl who makes time stop.
“Love is a concept” they say,
“Time is a construct”
“You chose to be gay”
Love is real.
Time is just a restriction.
And if I “chose” to be gay
I chose right.
Love has to make sense to us
And time does not have to restrict us
Everyday I wake up knowing I’ll see you
with your sleeves folded over
your Sperry’s on, walking like you own the world
and I’ll smile,
more than I ever have
Every moment I see the grey jacket,
the glasses perched on your nose,
and your natural curls,
Time stops.
Time is a restriction, but time does not stop us
It won’t.
I know it won’t because
everytime I wake up and time stops,
it also continues with you.
Another day
Another memory
Another love story to tell the kids of our future,
regardless of if we are together or not.
So I thank you,
I thank you for taking me into your arms,
letting me nestle my chin into your chest.
For giving me a reason to wake up and live,
even on days where that is the last thing I want to do.
For showing me that love is possible and exciting
That politics is important
That this life is important.
But most importantly, thank you
Thank you for being the girl who stops time