I knew a little about trains
my Mother and Father and I
went to Washington DC on a train
we saw the Smithsonian and the Lincoln Memorial
I caught pneumonia and almost died
in the hospital
my Mother bought me a small red transistor radio
it looked like a rocketship and had a little ear phone
the Navy flew me home
I was too sick for the train
my father bought me a train for my first birthday
an American Flyer
he set the train up every Christmas
and each year one of my presents
was a new mechanical wonder for the train set
later, the tables turned and
using money from my mother
each Christmas I would proudly buy a new gizmo for him
we had stop and go crossings, cow on the tracks,
trestles, a lumberyard,
a forklift that loaded and unloaded barrels onto special cars,
a RR station with little people, benches, and trees
and a caboose that had a light inside
maybe it was that caboose's light
a childlike brilliance that reflected in my father's eyes
whenever he touched that train
but the best thing was that train’s engine
little gelatinous bottles of liquid smoke
poured into the engine's smoke stack
caused puffs of acrid American Flyer train smoke
I can still smell that smoke
my father built a wooden box
for the increasing number of mechanical controls
new controls entered into the box by the end of each Christmas day
my mother told me each year that he bought the train for me
but I was sure that train was his
each Christmas
setting up the train and carefully plotting the perfect locations
for the ever-increasing paraphernalia was fun
for awhile
but the most fun was planning train wrecks
really good, well planned train wrecks
would cause my friends and I to squeal with laughter
and cause my father to rage
he really loved that train
and usually all too soon he would tire of us abusing his train
and he would carefully oil and wrap each piece of track
place each piece of mechanical magic back in its original box
and the train’s large cardboard home would disappear
gone for another year
I grew up and forgot all about the train
then years
overtaken by a late night phone call
much like the cabooses on real trains
my father's light suddenly extinguished
after a meaningless ceremony and a twenty-one gun salute
I inherited a neatly folded flag, a few tools, and the train
the flag is buried somewhere
unseen in an old trunk, a few tools survive
and my father's train
lies rusting in a damp basement
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