Bullets sprayed around me. Jensen pushed one of the men off balance and followed after me. One of the bullets sliced through Jensen’s hand and went through the box. I couldn’t tell if the red on the box was from Jensen or whatever was inside. We ran out of The Basement and into a random elevator and hit 13.
Jensen ripped the box from my arms and tore it open.
“What are you doing?” I shouted, “We don’t have the equipment to operate on demonic kittens in this elevator?”
“What are you talking about?” He pulls a long, red drenched, object out of the box, “This was a shipment of ketchup for the kitchen. We can use the broken glass as weapons.”
“Are you kidding me? Why was I woken up for an emergency delivery?”
“I brought chicken nuggets for my break and I can’t eat them plain.”
I contemplated stabbing Jensen with my two bottles, but the door opened and there were five guns aimed at us. One of the suited men touched his ear and said, “We got them”. They came in and handcuffed Jensen and I.
I stood there completely dumbfounded. “What’s going on here?”
“Jensen is under arrest for unlawful experiments on stolen kittens. He has been trying to modify kittens to make a kitten army for years now. We finally confirmed that his basement was full of about five thousand felines with guns for arms. You are under arrest for the kitten theft, and probably more when we can confirm your involvement with the experiments.”
I looked at Jensen. He didn’t say anything, looking guilty as hell. “You told me that the devil was possessing kittens and we had to steal them to take out the demonic part of their soul!”
The suited men laughed.
I am an idiot.
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